Gracie Allen Reporting
By Gracie Allen
While everyone is arguing about universal military training for men, along comes Professor Hooton of Harvard, saying that all women should be drafted for army training. He says it will gratify women’s desire to “wear the pants in the family.”
And he has the nerve to add that it will reduce women’s figures to a point where they can wear pants “without creating a repellent spectacle.”
Now just a minute, professor. You may think you’re safe at Harvard, but I dare you to step over to Vassar and say that.
But don’t feel too badly, girls. Professor Hooton teaches anthropology, so I looked it up and found that anthropology is the study of anthropoids and anthropoids are apes. Well, if he teaches apes, he can’t be too bright anyway. I’ve never met an ape yet who could read or write.